Friday, May 8, 2015

Sharing is Caring : A reason to Marry

“Is food ready? Serve it fast to all the men of the house. They have already taken bath…” 
“It’s their sleeping time, make their bed ready.”
“All men had their lunch, now we can eat.” 

...Till many decades ago, all ladies in the house would be quicker,….more active to serve all the men faster, proper, did not matter if their babies were crying, or they were feeling ailing …..

All household chores were the responsibility of the female being only….. “Hubby is your God, you should always try to keep him happy.” All ladies would get this special teaching from the elders….

Then, one or two decades down the line:

“If we buy this house, I think it will be good!” Working women started putting their opinion, though with hesitance.

Or you got to hear.....

“Wow, your husband cooked today? You are so lucky!”
“You know, Rita’s husband is hand-packed, I saw him doing something in the kitchen that day.”

In most of the families, you would not generally see male working in the kitchen or doing any kind of household stuff….. Female, did not matter whether working or not working, cook at home, take care of the baby,  swipe the house alone……Some men, despite of wanting to help spouse, had to resist as all cared about backbiting…


And the times now…..My Story:

“It’s really tasty….Kisne banaya?” Amit asked me while I offered homemade sweets to all my team mates in the lunch table at the office canteen.

“Surely tumhare hubby ne….you cannot make so tasty…I will never believe if you say you have.” Ritika was sure.

….And yes, she was right. I proudly said, "Yes Ritika! You are right."


Lifestyle is changing, generation after generation. What I believe, our hostel lives, or our bachelor lives for many years, generally are contributing towards this ‘#ShareTheLoad’. Now, share the load means showing respect and understanding between the spouse, leading a healthy life….unlike serving hubby as a God or laughing at other’s hubby as hand-packed.


Special reasons to add on why I married my hubby: :) 

Reason I :  I and my brother used to stay together in Delhi, while got introduced to my hubby. Usually, he used to visit us on Sundays, as my brother and he was in the same hostel during their college.

One fine Sunday morning, our calling bell rang. My brother opened the door….a yucky smell hit my nose… future hubby was standing outside the door. He looked neat and clean…then why he was smelling so bad?

Thank God! Smell was not from him…but one cat relieved her stomach in front of our front door….that smelled deadly.

Now who would clean that???…..I and my brother started putting the responsibility on each other…..So, looking at our fight,  suddenly we saw, our guest putting one cloth on his nose and mouth and proceeded to clean the stuff with some newspapers….and hard plastic pieces. I was silent……but for the first time I was very impressed!!!!

Reason II : My brother and I used to get frequent invitations to their ‘Mess’…..a two bedroom set where three guys including my hubby used to live.  The dishes these guys used to cook were beyond expectation. The way they used to keep their house was impressive….They used to distribute the work very nicely…; one guy would cook, one would clean the house and another one would wash cloths. They properly Shared the load.


We got married……I replaced the two other guys…..We did not distribute our work formally…..but he was and is always there to help me in every task…..Be it buying groceries, carry them home, putting them in proper place, cooking meals, washing dishes, doing the laundry work, dusting the place or if needed, taking care of the baby in the mid night too. It’s really fun now… work together…..explore new dishes….finish work faster…..getting a shoulder to lean on….

I love to see him chopping onions for his special dishes, ironing cloth before going to office…..arranging home when we have guests at home. In friends’ get together….I enjoy guys cooking at the kitchen with their best spirit……and wives adding sweet fuels from outside……or taking care of the babies….and at last....eating food together….

Lighting the entire room with candles on special occasion, giving some expensive diamond ornament on birthday or anniversary, sending exquisite flowers to show love or booking the entire expensive restaurant all for you and your better half: all these can be add-ons. But is that really what love or caring all about?
Finding meaning of love and caring in our daily lives is more important. Sharing the load is the best way to show love and caring! 

Love is not love unless you express
Caring is not caring unless you feel it
Sharing is not sharing unless you feel relief
Marriage is not successful unless you have Caring, Sharing, Giving, Forgiving…and above all, Loving and being Loved….


I am writing for the #ShareTheLoad activity at in association withAriel.

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